Title: If Gondolas Could Talk
Author: John Hemming-Clark
Pages: 272
Publisher: Searchline Publishing 2022
Price: £10.99
ISBN 9781897864685
I do try to be honest in my opinion of books that I review, as my own reputation goes on the line every time.
I am not entirely sure that I agree with the publicity material surrounding If Gondolas Could Talk; I dipped into it at random and found every one of the items I sampled pedestrian and unsatisfying.
But how many light-hearted books about skiing are ever published, especially just in time to give as a Christmas present? And how many of that vanishingly small number feature an anecdote about Wengen, which will leave every DHO reader striving to work out which hotel the narrator was staying in?
The major clue is that she says it has a swimming pool, which narrows it down to three, as far as I can recall, not having been there since before Covid struck.
This is what John Hemming-Clark says about his book.
“Everyone* who has ever skied has a ski story - If Gondolas could Talk has one hundred and one of the very best.
“There are contributions by or about pop stars, MPs and royalty, but mostly they're people like me and you.
“I have skied nearly every year for the past forty years, and along the way I have amassed more than my fair share of ski stories. I can't believe no one has ever put together such a book, but they have now!
“This is a diverse collection, mostly humorous, that feature Alpine ski resorts in the main, lifts, instructors, chalet hosts, hotels, restaurants, bars. lift attendants, cross-channel ferries, overnight stops, motorways, péages, dry slopes and other skiers. A sizeable number of the contributors to this book have been unable to return to the resorts from where their stories have originated.
“My own contributions are based on my inability to ski, learn a foreign language or behave at anything approaching a competent, let alone professional, level whether by design or accident, in and around the Alps. It appears from the offerings that I have received for this new book that I am not alone.
“You can read much more including an introduction to all the stories at www.johnhemmingclark.com/skistories. Here's a taster:
Les Arcs: Never mess with chalet staff's night off.
Cervinia: Safeguarding shocker with the ski instructor.
Chamonix: A not-very-friendly Café de l'Amitié.
Courchevel: L'andouillette AAAAA. Possibly the worst thing you can ever put in your mouth.
Gstaad: Accidental acquisition by an ageing aristocrat...
...and many, many more!
ISBN 9781897864685
Amazon: https://amzn.eu/d/abBGck8
More details: www.johnhemmingclark.com/skistories
As with all of my books, mirth guaranteed or your money back!
With best wishes.
John
*99.9%
